Dear Future Husband…

Brooke Nipar/Courtesy of Epic Records
Brooke Nipar/Courtesy of Epic Records

Pop superstar and controversial singing queen Meghan Trainor has just released her new single, ‘Dear Future Husband’, which is already topped to hit the Top 40 of the British single charts. After a string of already edgy chart successes, talking about men’s hatred of skinny bitches and men’s love of lying, so now she’s taking things into her own hands by telling her men exactly how she wants them to behave instead.

During her latest pop classic, she tells her man to “Take me on a date, I deserve it babe, and don’t forget the flowers every anniversary,” as well as the very real confession that chivalry will always help boost success in the bedroom department.

While I can already sense that this is going to erupt in feminist outrage, demanding that women can have whatever they want and shouldn’t need no men to open doors for us in the first place, (which, for the record, I one million percent agree with and stand for), I can’t help but preach Miss T for an amazing and totally justified approach at tackling the charts.

There are millions of love songs that talk about how much girl loves boy, about how girl needs boy, about how boy was dumbstruck when he saw girl and now they love each other so much they can’t go on alone. But we all damn know it doesn’t happen that way.

bridal-636018_1280In fact, it’s far more likely that you’ll meet under the stars, or by the beach, or whatever metaphor your iTunes is throwing out today, then come up with a big list of Pros and Cons to work your way through, and finally conclude that you were too different to begin with and head in your different directions. Sorry Swifty.

We’d all get a lot further in the dating world if we had a list of prerequisites to any further encounter. Whether it’s as simple as a preferred hair colour, or whether you have the entire psychological profile of Mr Right mapped out, it cuts out the crap. First date – you can decide Yes or No based on his answers to your not-so-subtle questioning. Save all further heartache from there. Easy.

And who better to lead the way in this No Bullshit approach to dating than our larger than life musical best pal Meghan.

She’s finally standing up and saying what she wants, because it’s what we deserve. We’re amazing, independent, sexy women, who deserve men who make an effort and spend every day remembering how awesome we are. None of this half-arsed ‘hook up’ culture crap, but the realisation that we are awesome and men need to bloody work for it.

If Future Mr Becky has done his research and read my blog, he’ll be more than aware of the long list of requirements that will accompany our relationship. And hey, that’s fine by me. At least I’m giving the boy a fighting chance.

Sure, maybe Meghan’s list of dream traits is different to some, and sure, perhaps it doesn’t promote individual womanhood in the best way – but it does a damn good job at promoting our needs and desires of any man that comes our way.

I’ve said it before – being single can be pretty awesome. Any Future Husband needs to be worth given that up for.

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